Do I Have the Faith to Forgive?

Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ (2 Thessalonians 1:2). Amen.

"My husband, Charlie, he wanted to save young men, just like the one who took his life. On the cross, our Savior said, 'Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.' That young man, I forgive him." Those are the words spoken two weeks ago by Erika Kirk at the funeral of her husband, Charlie Kirk.

It doesn't matter your political views. These were the heartfelt and heart-rending words of a widow to a man who had left her without a husband and their two young children without a father. Yet, she was able to extend Christ's forgiveness from the cross to her husband's murderer.

What about you? Are you able to forgive someone who has hurt you? Damaged you? Taken something valuable from you?

The widow of a slain Sheridan police officer made a powerful victim impact statement in court this week, saying she will "forever live with the agony" of what happened to her husband. She also said that she often finds it difficult to quell the "rage and bitterness" that remain with her since her husband's death. You can understand and appreciate her words, can't you?

Can you forgive your parents who were verbally abusive and physically unloving to you while growing up? Can you forgive the grown child who has forsaken your family and destroyed all relationships within the family? Can you forgive your former spouse for his harshness or her vindictiveness? Can you forgive the supervisor and coworkers for the toxic work environment you were exposed to? Can you forgive the pastor or teacher who failed you? Can you forgive the neighbor whose dogs and loud pick-up truck have no concept of time or noise?

Those are great questions. Perhaps all of them can be summed up with this question: "Do I have the faith to forgive?"

Jesus gives us a hard task when he teaches us about rebuking and forgiving. He says, "If your brother sins, rebuke him. If he repents, forgive him. Even if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times returns to you and says, 'I repent,' forgive him" (Luke 17:3-4). Both of these commands to rebuke and forgive are extremely difficult to put into practice. It's challenging to lovingly rebuke a fellow believer. Rebuke means to offer a strong correction of sinful behavior or to reprimand disordered actions. Rebuking is challenging. We'll be tempted to remain silent to keep the peace. Or be silent for fear of retribution. Or be silent for worry of being called a "hypocrite" or "self-righteous." Rebuking is also difficult because when we do speak up, we'll be tempted to be too harsh or too personal with our criticism. Or we speak up and we open old wounds or create new ones. So, we can harm people with no rebuke or damage them with too strong of a rebuke.

We are called by Jesus to rebuke with the purpose of leading the person to repentance, restoration, and Christ's forgiveness. Rebuking serves to redirect someone who has gone astray, leading them to return to the path of Jesus Christ.

Equally challenging is to forgive the person who has hurt you. We may think we are letting them off the hook if we forgive quickly. Or we are giving them a license to keep on sinning against us if we forgive too often. Or we may question the sincerity of their sorrow when they start doing the same thing over and over. Or we may want them to show us proper contrition with tears, guilt, and some form of penance. We want them to "earn" our forgiveness with their actions.

It's more natural to ignore an offense or to allow it to fester within our heart than to lovingly rebuke. It's more natural for us to seek revenge or to hold a grudge than to forgive.

You know from experience how difficult it is to forgive. And then others make it even more difficult! Your coworker apologizes for some minor offense by saying, "I'm sorry." You reply, "I forgive you." Then your coworker takes offense. She feels that what she didn't wasn't so awful that she needed forgiveness!

You also know from experience that when Jesus encourages you to turn the other cheek, people will then line up to swat you on the other cheek. When Jesus invites you to forgive seventy-seven times, people will sin against you another seventy-six times.

There were plenty of people on social media who criticized Erika Kirk for her forgiveness. On a side note – social media can be fun, informative, and a unique way to share the gospel. It is also a cesspool of evil. Reading and responding to social media comments on my podcasts are a level of hell that I don't like dipping my toe into!

Some were saying on social media that it was weak for Erika to forgive her husband's killer. They don't understand the divine strength it takes to forgive in Christ's name. Apparently, those critics believe we're only supposed to forgive people once they give a perfectly worded apology. One comment read, "God only forgives those that ask for it. Forgiving someone when they haven't asked for forgiveness is not godly, its virtue signaling."

Jesus doesn't present forgiveness as an encouragement or a suggestion. It's a command. Jesus says multiple times in our Gospel, "Forgive him." We pray in the Lord's Prayer that if we withhold forgiveness, we should not expect forgiveness from our Father in heaven. "Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us." St. Paul echoes this, calling believers to forgive, "just as God in Christ has forgiven us" (Ephesians 4:32).

Forgiveness is not about excusing sin or excusing justice. It's about personally reflecting God's mercy. Remember, Jesus asked his Father to forgive us on the cross, even while we remained unrepentant, "Father, forgive them for they don't know what they're doing." St. Paul puts it this way, "While we were still sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8).

Others mocked Erika that she could smile and laugh at her husband's funeral. Some of the biggest smiles and loudest laughs I've ever heard have been at Christian funerals. Like St. Paul says, we Christians do not mourn as those who have no hope (1 Thessalonians 4:13). Our smiles, memories, and peace in the face of heartbreaking tragedies are not signs of denial or weakness. They are rooted in Christ's resurrection from the grave. One comment summarized this well, "If you can't fathom how Erika Kirk could dare smile today, maybe it's because you need to meet her God."

The apostles had met their God. He was standing right in front of them in the person of Jesus Christ! They realized how hard it was to forgive … and keep on forgiving. They responded, "Increase our faith" (Luke 17:5). The apostles recognized how humanly impossible it is to forgive. The sinful nature within every human refuses to rebuke, delays forgiveness, and harbors grudges. Cognizant of their own weakness and inability to carry out Jesus' command, they cried out to Jesus, "Increase our faith!"

What a beautifully simplistic prayer for us to bring to the Lord each day. Just as we are to daily pray for forgiveness, so we are to daily pray for an increase of faith so we can forgive. Include praying the Lord's Prayer to increase your faith to forgive. Pray the Lord's Prayer on your own. When you are upset with someone, pray with them. Then, pray the Lord's Prayer with them. It's hard to stay mad at someone when you're praying with them.

Jesus responds to their prayer for increased faith by saying, "If you had faith like a mustard seed, you could tell this mulberry tree, 'Be uprooted and planted in the sea,' and it would obey you" (Luke 17:6). Jesus knows how impossible it is for us to keep forgiving someone over and over again for the same sins. Still, he commands us to forgive. What Jesus commands us to do, he empowers us to do. So, when we ask, "Do I have the faith to forgive," Jesus answers with a definitive "Yes!" He gives you the ability to forgive through the power of the Holy Spirit through faith in him as your Savior. This is a faith that was instilled in you through Baptism or conversion. A faith that grows through constant use of Word and Sacraments.

Jesus was not teaching us to fling trees into oceans. That's good! Because where we live, we have very few trees and even fewer oceans.

Even a faith as small as a mustard seed can enable us to forgive and then do everything else we need to do as God's kingdom servants. If you trust in Jesus, you have enough faith to forgive even as you have been forgiven. You have the faith to do impossible things for Christ's kingdom.

We're going to do something right now that I haven't done before in a sermon. But I think this will be helpful today and going forward in future sermons. Please bow your head. Speak to God as you privately confess your sins of failing to forgive someone for their sins against you.

Silence for private confession.

Brothers and sisters in Christ, Jesus has forgiven you for your lack of forgiveness. He does not withhold forgiveness from you. Instead of drowning you in the depths of the sea with a millstone necklace, he has drowned your sins in the deep waters of the baptismal font. Instead of demanding that you toss around mulberry trees, Jesus was crucified upon the tree of the cross. Jesus did not wait for you to be repentant before he forgave you. He prayed on the cross, "Father, forgive them – these unrepentant sinners – for they have no clue what they're doing." You are forgiven. Go in peace.

Jesus teaches, "Which one of you who has a servant plowing or taking care of sheep will say to him when he comes in from the field, 'Come at once and recline at the table'? Won't the master tell him instead, 'Prepare my supper, and after you are properly dressed, serve me while I eat and drink. After that you may eat and drink'? He does not thank the servant because he did what he was commanded to do, does he? So also you, when you have done all that you were commanded, say, 'We are unworthy servants. We have only done what we were supposed to do'" (Luke 17:7-10).

The Lord who calls you to repeatedly forgive has not grown weary of forgiving your daily trespasses. The Lord who calls for humble plowing, shepherding, and table-waiting within his kingdom, also wrapped a towel around his waist to wash his disciples' feet. Now he wraps a towel around his waist to wash away your sins with his baptismal waters. He doesn't expect you to prepare a table for him. Instead, he invites you today to his holy table. The Lord, to whom we owe eternal service, chooses to serve you through his means of Word and Sacraments. The Lord, in whom you put your faith, promises to be the power behind even your tiny, mustard seed faith.

With an increase of faith in our gracious and powerful Savior, we can defy the laws of nature and science. With our Master serving us, we simply do what we are commanded to do as his grateful and unworthy servants. We can forgive unconditionally. We can serve faithfully.

Tim Allen, the star of shows like Home Improvement and Last Man Standing, expressed how much of an impact Erika's speech had on him. Allen's father died in 1964 after a drunk driver's vehicle collided with his vehicle. Allen was 11 years old at the time of his father's death. Tim Allen posted on X, "When Erika Kirk spoke the words on the man who killed her husband: 'That man … that young man … I forgive him.' That moment deeply affected me. I have struggled for over 60 years to forgive the man who killed my Dad. I will say those words now as I type: 'I forgive the man who killed my father.' Peace be with you all."

We can rightly ask like Jesus' apostles, "Do I have the faith to forgive?" Yes, you do. Because Jesus' forgiveness gives you both the faith and the ability to forgive. Jesus' words forgive you. Your words forgive others. And your words of forgiveness releases others to forgive. Believe these words. Live these words. Pronounce these words. These words that you are blessed to hear in worship: "God, our heavenly Father, has forgiven all your sins. By the perfect life and innocent death of our Lord Jesus Christ, he has removed your guilt forever. You are his own dear child. May God give you strength to live according to his will." Amen.

We are always praying for you, that our God will make you worthy of your calling and use his power to fulfill every good desire and work of your faith, so that the name of our Lord Jesus Christ may be glorified in you and you in him (2 Thessalonians 1:11, 12). Amen.